Here's wishing babies could talk...

Today I took James to the doctor for his well-baby visit and found out he had an ear infection. He's been more fussy than normal and seeming to have a hard time swallowing but he hasn't been running a fever and he's teething like crazy (even his gums are bleeding) so I thought it was all because of his teeth. (He's got 6 now!) I remember one time especially with Bekah being frustrated with her being fussy and just thinking it was her not wanting to go to sleep as a 1-year old only to find out she had ear infections in both ears! I felt like such a terrible parent then. This time I know better than to think that--it's inevitable when a little person can't tell you (no matter how much they want to) that they hurt and where they hurt. But it still doesn't make the mom feel better that her child hurts.

So this is James' first experience with "the pink stuff". Bekah kept begging to have some today...so after a little talk about why we don't share medications, we got to talk a little about all the times she's had to have ear infection medicine and that sometime in the future she'll probably get to take it again. So James is on that and the doctor specifically asked that we keep him on Tylenol for two days to see if we can get him to eat better...that maybe that's why he's not gaining weight. Today he was only 15 pounds 11 ounces. The doctor is starting to get worried and is having us meet with a nutritionist to talk about options such as high-calorie formula. If he doesn't improve in a month, she wants him to see a pediatric specialist at the children's hospital. 

I keep going back and forth these last few months to being worried about him and not being worried about him. He is such a happy baby (usually) and content to smile and play and explore but in his quiet way. He loves solid foods and we are feeding him almost constantly. If it's not time to nurse or take a nap, it feels like he's always in his high chair eating solids! Poor kid! I feel better, though, when I talk to other moms who went through something similar and realize that sometimes you have to listen to your inner-mom-voice that tells you he's okay and tune out what others are saying. I can only do the best I can and take one day at a time. This is even more true when I realize that stressing out about it only makes the milk I produce worse. I just have to let go and put more trust in Heavenly Father that He'll make everything okay.