Stuck in the Moment

I have to admit that I've been slacking on blogging. As I have been getting more into blogging and keeping in touch with others through the internet, I have been getting stuck with my own blog. And it's not that I feel like I HAVE to be blogging. It's this...
It's so invigorating at first to get so many cool ideas for crafting or read about inspirational life stories on other people's blogs. It becomes addicting to see the latest posts or projects and ride others' emotional roller coasters. I sure have gained strength from seeing others stay strong through trials or even just keep going when life seems to be mundane. So pretty soon it becomes more fun to read others' blogs than post on your own. That's certainly easier than trying to explain your own life and learn from it. But then some really not-so-good things can starting poking around in your mind...things like 'I guess I'll wait to post until I finish that one project I've been working on so I can have something like that to say on my blog', 'I'll wait until something exciting happens', and then you start thinking 'yet another day where I didn't finish that project' or 'something exciting didn't happen again', and then the clincher 'I must not be creative like others are' and before you know it you're in a downward spin...it's depressing! The great things about blogging can get overwhelmed with the not-so-good things of blogging, and then you feel like 'ahhh! I just started something else I can't keep up with!' (Which is another thing I struggle with balance on...technology and me have a love/hate relationship...I can navigate it fine, but it sure does seem to make life less simple...maybe I'll post more about that later.)

It's so surprising at times to me how Satan can work his way into every good thing to make it into something that benefits his purpose if you let it. So it's the same old challenge of finding balance in all things. This doesn't mean I'll give up blogging so I don't get tempted to go near his traps, but it does mean I need to be more careful. I already have seen so many good things for myself and my family coming from this. (I think I will try to set some better realistic expectations for myself and keep focused on the positive. Maybe even set some limits. Sometimes parents need those just as much as kids.)

And one of those great things about blogging for me is that in written form I do at times feel like I am creating something. Maybe my blog isn't filled with the sewing projects I've started or would like to start (because sewing is one of my loves), but I feel like when I spend time like this to reflect I am creating a sense of self, a stronger sense of family, a stronger sense of spirituality. I am creating something. Some say that women have more of a need to create and nurture than men...I don't know. But I know I don't feel happy if I'm not creating.

"I must create a system or be enslaved by another mans; I will not reason and compare: my business is to create." -William Blake

This was quoted in a movie I saw recently, like this:
" 'I must create'...something...'or be enslaved by another man's'...oh, something, I can't remember...'my business is to create'...something...what is the something! All I know is if you don't figure out the 'something' you just stay ordinary. And it doesn't matter if it's a work of art, or a taco, or a pair of socks! Just create something new and there it is. And it's you out in the world, outside of you, and you can look at it or hear it or read it or feel it. And you know a little bit more about you. A little bit more than anybody else does."

This struck home to me. Every day I create something. Is it a good creation? Can I make it better tomorrow? Sometimes maybe the only thing I create is dinner. And a packaged dinner at that because the day was falling apart and I want to try better in the future, but it's enough for today. Or maybe I created a moment in time while reading to my children. Those little things are what add up to big things. I just have to keep noticing them and enjoying them. Goodness knows as a mother there is so much more to create in that child after it's born than when you're creating it inside yourself. But there are times when you need to create something that's just for you too.

I just finished reading "Tending Roses". Really good read. Goes right along with this. Something about "the times when my life was the best were then times when the roses grew wild"; meaning if gardening your roses is your favorite hobby, or in my case, sewing is your favorite hobby, we can't forget that the best times of our lives are when we don't have time to give our hobbies as much attention as we would like to. And be okay with that and enjoy what you can.

Part of one of my favorite U2 songs:

And you are such a fool
To worry like you do
I know it's tough, and you can never get enough
Of what you don't really need now...my oh my

You've got to get yourself together
You've got stuck in a moment and you can't get out of it
Don't say that later will be better
Now you're stuck in a moment and you can't get out of it

And if the night runs over
And if the day won't last
And if your way should falter
Along this stony pass
It's just a moment
This time will pass

Here's to getting 'unstuck' and making more time to notice and think about what I am creating.